Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I have post one night stand depression
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