she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize