Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Randomize
