dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
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