You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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