Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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