He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
literally had 100 drinks last night.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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