He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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