I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
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He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
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I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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