im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
