i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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