One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
