Sry I called you an 8
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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