I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Two words: nipple clamps
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