I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
