The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize