so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
