i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize