I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
