I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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