And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
