Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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