you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
