some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
