I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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