i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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