Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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