Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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