i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
