Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
