We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Randomize
