Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
