Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
