I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
