He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
