Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
