are you still at the devil's house?
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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