Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
