Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
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I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
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I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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