Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
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You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
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We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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