I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
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Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
