You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize