Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
