We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
We need to get me chipped asap
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
