You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
