We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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