Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
