Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize