Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
3pm strippers are depressing
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
