the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize