Pappa wants mamma naked
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
